Reuters file

Chuck Lorre, left, poked fun at former star Charlie Sheen again in a holiday card that does not overtly mention the actor.

Many people send holiday cards featuring photos of themselves, but Chuck Lorre, producer of "Two and a Half Men," went one step further.

Lorre, whose well-publicized troubles with former "Men" star Charlie Sheen dominated entertainment headlines for weeks in 2011, sent out a card showing himself being pounded on by a large gorilla, Deadline,com reported.

While Lorre doesn't mention the Sheen situation directly, he writes of the gorilla-pounding: “Oddly enough, not my worst day this year,” the site reports.

Lorre is also known for the sometimes pointed messages he writes in vanity cards shown after episodes of his show. And Deadline links to his 2009 holiday card, which features two versions of Lorre. In the one captioned "A world without sitcoms" he's apparently homeless, but in the one captioned "A world with sitcoms," he's wearing an academic robe and sitting by his star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, raising a drink and wearing sunglasses.

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Comedy Central airs its Charlie Sheen roast Monday night, and I for one, will not be watching. I'm not taking some sort of stand against the concept as a whole -- sure these roasts can be unkind but they tend to be fun. And even at their most uncouth, there does tend to be some benefit to the jokes –- roasting of a celeb can double as a clinic for comedy writing. And please, Sheen fans (if you're still out there?), let's be clear: I'm not calling for a complete boycott, either.

Kevin Winter / Getty Images

Charlie Sheen speaks onstage during the Primetime Emmy Awards in Los Angeles on Sunday night.

Instead, I'm just sending to the universe a message that I'll be putting my time to some better use. The whole crazy-Charlie thing is just so tired, and so over.

Sunday night's cameo at the Emmy awards is a prime example of why the spotlight needs to be fixed on anyone other than Sheen. At this point, and especially after Sheen last week made the mea culpa rounds on television, the novelty of wondering what he might do next has really worn off. At best, his appearance comes off as a little sad and at worst, seeing Sheen onstage these days leaves a really awkward aftertaste.

Charlie Sheen will have his comeback, though it's not going to happen if he NEVER GOES AWAY. He's cut back on Twitter, and that helps, but cut back on putting yourself on camera, Charlie. I'm usually the first to admit that the best way to ingratiate yourself with an audience is to be able to make fun of yourself. But in the case of the roast, the timing is off -- we lived out the era of Adonis DNA in real time, and again and again (and again) on every late night show -- this is all happening way too late.

When Sheen really goes away for a while for real, and then returns with a new project, I'll watch. I believe the guy is good, and I believe in a comeback. This just certainly isn't it.

I want to hear what you think. Will you watch? Leave me a note in the comments.

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Robert Sutton / AP

News that Charlie Sheen was shopping a new comedy series and was in fact in "deep negotiations" spread quickly Monday afternoon.

If it is true that we're a step closer to seeing the troubled actor back on a television series, no one is willing to admit they're the lucky network that's is taking on the project. Sources at CBS and NBC tell Scoop there's no way they're taking on a Sheen show; Deadline reports that ABC is out as well.

"This is something that's been put out there by his management to generate buzz," said one source, who has recently been in communications with the Sheen camp. "There's nothing that is at the 'deep negotiation' stage yet ... no one is ready to trust him."

The source adds that Sheen is also growing short on cash and is anxious to get a new project underway.

"I get that he wants work. There is a lot of cash going out from him and little coming in now, and he needs the money," the source said. "That is part of the reason he put his house on the market. But here's what he doesn't get: no one wants to work with him again yet. He's too much a loose cannon."

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While Charlie Sheen’s now-infamous meltdown came after months of mounting public woes, the actor’s former “Two and a Half Men” co-star, Jon Cryer, insists that Sheen’s behavior came as a complete shock as far as he and others on the set of the show were concerned.

“It’s as much a mystery to me as it is to everybody, I think,” Cryer told “Late Show” host David Letterman. “I got a text from someone — I don’t even remember who it was — saying, ‘Charlie Sheen just called Thomas Jefferson a p----.’ I said, ‘I think things are getting out of hand.’”

According to Cryer, the reason Sheen’s actions seemed so unexpected was simply because no matter what the embattled star had been through in the past, there was no precedent for how far it eventually went.

“I mean, this has never happened before, honestly,” Cryer explained. “It wasn’t like, ‘Back in 1963, everybody remembers when Fred MacMurray went bats--- and started talking about freemason ninjas and stuff. He was crazy! And Vivian Vance started urinating on the set of ‘Here’s Lucy.’ So nobody knew. Nobody was prepared for this. I did not see it coming. Nobody saw it coming.”

But Cryer won’t be caught off guard again. He joked that he’s keeping an eye out on his soon-to-be co-star Ashton Kutcher.

“What gave me pause (about Ashton) was (when he) came on the (CBS) plane he says, ‘You know what I love about private jets? You can bring knives onboard,” the actor recalled with a laugh.

“Chapter two: he’s crazy like the first guy,” Letterman warned.

What do you think about Cryer's comments? Share your thoughts on our Facebook page.

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Now that Ashton Kutcher has landed an enviable Hollywood gig by filling the gap Charlie Sheen left behind on “Two and a Half Men,” “Late Night” host Jimmy Fallon believes he’s found the perfect role for Sheen. If Kutcher gets “Men,” then Sheen should get “Punk’d.”

Actually, Fallon envisions an ego-driven twist for the actor. The show would be called “Sheen’d.” Those wondering what such a show might look like are in luck. On Thursday night, Fallon once again put on his best Sheen impression (which is pretty darned amazing) and previewed “Sheen’d.”

“Welcome my gods and goddesses,” Fallon’s faux Sheen said. “I, the Sheen-man, have this new show where I get to pull the most bitchin’ pranks on droopy-eyed trolls. These pranks are so gnarly, they might melt your face off."

Those puckish acts include pouring soda on some guy’s keyboard, eating an unsuspecting woman’s apple and irritating one office worker by flicking his overhead light on and off. Each not-so-clever trick was punctuated by the main man yelling “Sheen’d!”

Take that, Kutcher!

Share your thoughts about Fallon’s latest Sheen gag on our Facebook page.

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Even before CBS confirmed that Ashton Kutcher would officially be filling the gaping hole left by Charlie Sheen joining the cast of “Two and a Half Men,” Twitter was rife with opinions about the addition of Kutcher.

Neil Patrick Harris had a very positive response, tweeting, "Ashton's replacing Charlie? Good Times! CBS shindigs just got much easier on the eyes..."

“Arrested Development” producer John Levenstein foretold the future, writing Sheen, “may have overplayed his hand.”

Jeopardy champ Ken Jennings took the cerebral route, mocking Kutcher’s math skills and his tweet about the square root of 6.5 (it’s 2.5, in case you didn’t catch it).

Within minutes of the announcement, David Letterman’s head writers and co-executive producers Justin and Eric Stangel were at it. Eric suggested renaming Sheen's tour the “Torpedo of Unemployment.” 

And Justin pointed out that for Charlie, who’s now out of work, Regis Philbin will be creating an opening on a television show quite soon.

“Cougar Town” producer Kevin Biegel joked that Sheen's got something else lined up already. “Ahem ... did you hear, Charlie Sheen signed on for his next project. It’s called, “Dude, Where’s My Job?”

So far Sheen has remained mum, not returning text messages or tweeting about his replacement, but his "Torpedo of Truth" guitarist Robert Patterson wrote simply, “Time for GYM.”

What do you think about the replacement? Leave a comment below.

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“Two and a Half Men” creator Chuck Lorre might see a future for the hit sitcom without Charlie Sheen, but the show’s former star insists there is no "Men" without him.

Sheen shot off a low-blow-filled open letter to Lorre, via TMZ, just hours after a report alleged that the executive producer planned a Sheen-free “Men" reboot.

“MY fans may tune in for a minute, but at the end of the day, no one cares about your feeble show without me,” the actor boasted. “Shame on you. Not even a phone call to the man that put you on the map. The man that put 500 million dollars in your pockets. You were on your way out of Warner Bros. with a buy out and a cup of cold coffee in your shaky and clammy hands. And then I walked into your office. And you created a show BASED ON MY AWESOME LIFE. I busted my ass for 8 years to support your vision. Your dream. In turn, it is my nightmare.”

Once the initial show-based slams were out of the way, the actor then turned to taking potshots at Alcoholics Anonymous (or “the pathetic AA loser lounge,” as he calls it) while continuing with a no-holds-barred attack on Lorre. After that, the letter was little more than a string of one-note insults, as Sheen referred to the bigwig as a narcissist, coward, spineless rat, cockroach and “low rent, nut-less sociopath.”

Just in case Lorre missed the point of the missive between all the bashes, Sheen broke it down before signing off.

“I’m out here with my fans every night,” the man behind the "Torpedo of Truth" tour wrote. “The message is crystal clear: No Charlie Sheen. No Show.”

What do you think? Could “Men” go on sans Sheen?

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Although Charlie Sheen has long claimed that the ups, downs and general indulgences of his private life never really affected his acting work, some “Two and a Half Men” insiders say that just isn’t true. Sources say the man currently preparing for a legal battle with his former network and studio bosses slowly unraveled on set.

In a Daily Beast report, crew members and co-workers revealed that the actor kept his composure during the show’s first four seasons — otherwise known as his Denise Richards days. But Sheen’s partying apparently picked up after he divorced Richards and met and married Brooke Mueller.

By the show’s seventh season, insiders alleged the star started taking his post-party problems to work.

“He hated being there and he’d tell us,” one source said. “He’d complain about his character’s costume and just being there in general. Some of us wondered if he was trying to play us and get us talking about that as a play for his contract negotiations.”

But eventually it became obvious that something more was going on. On-set sources say Sheen could no longer hide his troubles after his October 2010 hotel smash-up and hospital stay.

“The writers were having to write around him a lot,” another insider explained to the Daily Beast. “They had him sitting on a couch a lot, and the focus was more on Jon Cryer and (Angus T. Jones). Charlie was forgetting his lines and he never did that before. He got progressively worse. Up close, you’d see that he was gaunt and pale and his eyes were crossed.”

According to yet another member of the crew, Sheen’s increasingly outrageous behavior, which eventually led to his termination, left many feeling “ a lot of anger toward” the actor.

“We don’t wish terrible things for him,” the source told the Daily Beast. “I just don’t ever want to see him again. I definitely don’t want to work with him.”

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First Charlie Sheen announced that he and his ex-bosses were in talks for his possible return to "Two and a Half Men." Then a letter from Warner Bros. attorneys made it clear that the talks didn’t and wouldn’t happen. Now? It looks there’s no end in sight to the did/did-not drama, as Sheen and his lawyer counter that response.

“That’s ridiculous,” Sheen’s attorney, Marty Singer, told The Hollywood Reporter of Warner Bros. claim that “there have been no discussions, there are no discussions, and there will be no discussions.” According to Singer, “There absolutely have been discussions. As late as this Tuesday there have been discussions about Charlie coming back and everyone was involved.”

Singer believes that the only reason Warner Bros. sent out a letter to the contrary is because last week, he sent the studio a demand for back-end payments allegedly owed to his client.

“This is the response (to that),” Singer said.

As for Sheen, he also claims the message from Warner Bros. is a lie. TMZ reports that during the Thursday night stop on the star’s “My Violent Torpedo of Truth/Defeat is Not an Option” tour, he told a Toronto audience that discussions were still on with the “Men” bigwigs.

"Negotiations with 'Two and a Half Men' are moving forward,” Sheen said. “We need to get in a room and fix this thing … give the people what they want."

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Getty Images

Charlie Sheen intends to make the most of the Boston stop on his “My Violent Torpedo of Truth/Defeat is Not an Option” tour. Shortly after his widely panned appearance at Agganis Arena, the actor stopped by Boston radio station WBZ-FM The Sports Hub to drop a “Two and a Half Men” bombshell — well, an alleged bombshell.

According to Sheen, despite getting the axe from his Warner Bros. bosses a month ago, he’s currently in talks to resume his role on the hit sitcom.

"There've been discussions, but I've been asked not to divulge anything,” Sheen divulged.

Of course, this isn’t the first time Sheen’s made such a claim. Just days before he was officially fired, the star announced that he and the former bosses  that he loves to bash were “close to something” and that “absolutely the gig is coming back.”

As for that business about getting fired, in Sheen’s Tuesday night radio interview, he revealed it could have easily been avoided had the bigwigs simply given him a heads-up.

“Had they told me at the end of Season 8 that that behavior wasn't going to be cool, I would have adjusted it,” he said.

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HDNet’s billionaire chairman Mark Cuban stopped by “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” Monday night to discuss possible future projects with his publicity-loving pal, Charlie Sheen, when suddenly, the actor took the stage.

Sheen went straight to Kimmel for an impromptu kiss before throwing t-shirts into the crowd. The somehow appropriately frenzied visit came to an end shortly after the former (for now) “Two and a Half Men” star presented the late-night host with a mug covered in foxes.

When Kimmel asked what the foxy mug meant, Sheen replied, “I’ll let you try to figure it out,” before making his exit.

No doubt the not-so-cryptic mug was meant to reference the actor’s alleged talks with FOX network execs.

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The buzz about Charlie Sheen’s possible return to “Two and a Half Men” continues to grow, but experts are sharply divided on whether or not such an unexpected about-face is in anyone’s best interest.

During a Tuesday morning appearance on TODAY, media analyst Steve Adubato insisted that, despite high rerun ratings, CBS and Warner Bros. wouldn’t be wise to bring Sheen and his “freak show” appeal back on board.

“The numbers have gone up because he’s a nut job. What I mean by that is it’s a freak show,” Adubato explained. “They’re looking at Charlie Sheen in the past. They’re looking at reruns of the show. I don’t believe Charlie Sheen, as he is today, as he presents himself today, as he looks today, is the same character, and I don’t believe it sells the way that it did before. … He’s a freak show now. That’s not what I believe they’re looking for on a weekly sitcom on a network.”

But trial attorney Linda Kenney Baden disagrees with Adubato’s take. According to Baden, Sheen still has plenty of appeal, and his reemployment would be a boon to everyone involved. Besides, in addition to being a ratings win, Baden believes CBS has legal and financial incentives to bring the actor back.

“In my opinion, they’re going to owe him a lot of money, either on the breach of contract or the discrimination issues, so it’s much cheaper to settle this,” the lawyer said. “You can settle it, and they can both be winners. CBS can be the winner. Les Moonves can look like a hero. Charlie Sheen can be a winner. The cast can be a winner. And more important — the public, who wants him back on this show, can be a winner.”

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